{ family portraits 101 }

Perhaps you're thinking it's time to gather the family together and capture them in time.  After all, this is the only summer they'll be as old as they are this summer.  So thanks to *Awkward Family Photos.com, I have come up with a few pointers to make this summer's pictorial event one that will NEVER be forgotten.  We Begin...

I find that 'themed' pictures are severely classy:

Pick your favorite book...
your favorite disney movie...
your favorite holiday...
{feel free to pick up an old sword for 'ambience'}
your favorite roller coaster...
{the more dramatical, the better...}
the family business...
or if you don't own a family business, grab some of dad's work shirts, throw in a couple of bunny ears and BAMM!!  Instant Classic.

If you can't seem to come up with the perfect 'theme', then here are a few Poses that are in a Classic League of their own.  It's all about placement, people:

The Classic Arm Shelf
The Three Finger Touch
The Pile-On 
{for those super 'comfy' poses- I'll let you decide if the heavier person should be on top or bottom}
The Elbow Hold
The Endearing Mother Pose
The 'You Take My Breathe Away' or 'Tic Tac' Pose
Can't seem to find the right pose for your kids?  Then you should try 
The Sibling Stretch
 You MUST make sure that the children with the shorter arms are hugging the bigger/older ones, though.  This is key.
Can't find the right pose for a group of 'older' people?  Try 
The Geriatric Jump  
{And for the 'jokesters' in the group, follow the man on the left and make it look like you're going to grab your neighbor's rear end.}
Forget your shirt?  That's okay!  Just use your children's heads to 'sensor' your family photos.  This pose is called 
The Discreet
Nothing shows 'love' like 
The Stand Downwind Pose
If you have a MASSIVE ring, please, don't hide it from the world.  This pose is called 
The Display

Our pets are a huge part of our lives and are considered 'family' by almost every pet owner out there.  Why not include them in the family photo shoot? 

And nothing says Merry Christmas more than this... 
{recognize the puppy on the man's shirt?} 

"But I don't have a pet," you might be saying to yourself.  Do not fear, there is still a way of adding that 'touch of class' to your family photos without a living, breathing animal:

super classy...
x-treme classy...

So many people are going 'retro' these days.  70's, 80's- it's all coming back.  To make sure that your 'retro' pictures are historically accurate, I have included some examples to follow when wardrobe shopping for your next family picture:

Double your pleasure, double your fun...
early eighties...
... or late eighties... you decide...

And speaking of wardrobe:

Tip #1 | Pick out matching shirts so that you can't tell where one person starts and one person ends 
{and who said that horizontal stripes weren't slimming?}
Tip #2 | Find unique sweaters that NO ONE else would EVER wear in their family photos
Tip #3 | If you can't find matching clothes- go for matching accessories {big glasses are the new 'cool'}

Now that we've covered some GREAT do's, let's look at some don'ts: 

Make sure your 'cool' family pose isn't mistaken for the 'Everyone Is Mad At Everyone And Can't Understand Why We're On This Stupid Trip Anyway' pose
Find a pose that distinguishes who's the father and who's the son
There are some 'true' feelings that should not be captured on film
There are some head positions that can change an 'I'm happy to be here' look to 'The Death of a Photographer' lookDon't use family pictures as a Public Service Announcement reminding everyone to change clothes if you spill in a 'certain area'And last but not least,

So enjoy the summer and don't forget your camera!!

*Parental Guidance Suggested...

9 post a comment :

Camryn said...

The horror of some of those pictures!!! Yikes!
The thick glasses, the hair...
After all those pictures, I feel so fashionably modern, even after being cooped up with kids all day :)

Erica said...

How funny. Great post TFS


Teri said...

Too, too funny. I wish I could say, only in the '80s, but we know that in twenty years we'll be looking back, saying the same thing about today's pics.

Thanks for the laugh! :)

Not exactly mother of the year said...

This is the most hilarious post ever. I hate to admit it, but I recognized my hair in some of those photos. Thanks for the laugh.

Reb said...

This is the greatest post. You have made my day. I am going to go gouge my eyes out now because of what I just saw. Have a lovely weekend.

pan x 8 said...

I love them all and I might just try all of them!!!

pan x 8 said...

I laughed at every single one of them! And did find myself in a handful of those poses! Sad, huh???

Melody said...

Those are too funny! What were they thinking? And no you can't see my prom picture!

Riddlez said...

Just stopped over from MMB. This was a great post. So, so funny. Thanks for making my day.

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