8.27.2009

{ seriously people }

Before I begin, I would like to take a moment to say:


Dear parents of Elementary-aged children,

School is not free day care. If your child is sick, PLEASE keep them home. For they have ever-so-generously shared their bacteria and germs with my son. And since I am the awesomest mommy, I have let him stay home, so as not to infect others. And now, well, we are all dealing with what is known as . . .

The Common Cold.

Thank you. So. Much.

***

Now that I've got that off my chest {whew! exhilarating!}, I must now share a tiny secret with you:

I laugh at people. Sometimes with them, but mostly AT THEM . And mostly at people who are trying to be serious. Dead serious. Take these people:

They sent me a nickel and asked me to return it to them with my donation, 'cause every nickel can help provide life-saving assistance to paralyzed veterans.

OKAY. Let me stop there. I am IN NO WAY LAUGHING AT PARALYZED VETERANS. Never, never, never, ever, ever would I even THINK of doing such a thing.

I'm just laughing at the nickel the charity mailed me. Which means they mailed nickels to others. Which makes my little brain start turning and wondering, "How much money do all the nickels they mailed out add up to?". Wouldn't it be easier to take all those nickels and donate it themselves?

THIS, my friends, is what makes me laugh. And wonder how many people are keeping their nickels and throwing away the paper. Not that I would do that- I'm going to write return to sender and put it back in the mail. Yep. I'm honest like that. {I heard those snickers . . .}

And then there's this {puhleeeaaase excuse the fact that this is a crappy picture}:

My hubby's paycheck stub. Which, again, gets that little brain of mine whirling and I think, "Did they write this as a joke, but forgot to change it on the final draft? Or did someone A C T U A L L Y do that, so now they must put it in ink so as to avoid a lawsuit?". Heeheehee. . . . . this makes me laugh . . . .

And then there's my luvah. I love him. And he loves me. But sometimes . . .

The other day he chewed me out lovingly reminded me how much he hates it when I store toilet paper rolls behind our pedestal sink. Somehow it gets a bit wet. And we all know what happens to toilet paper once it gets wet and then dries again. It can become nasty. But being the Scrooge CPA for our family's finances, I refuse to throw it away. It's still good, right?

W R O N G . Apparently, even though I buy the crappy public-restroom-paper-like TP {in my defense I do splurge on the double ply}, Mr. Smith thinks it's a whole heck of a lot worse when there's ridges in it. Or it happens to be the Quasimodo of the TP world. You're using it to wipe your butt. And then you throw it away. It gets all of 2 seconds use!!! So what if every now and then the pipe drips on the stored rolls. Don't blame me, blame the architect. I love pedestal sinks, but that means no storage. It is my firm belief that a M A N designed this place and conveniently forgot that people like to have storage areas. A linen closet would be nice . . . you know, to store towels, sheets and Toilet Paper in . . . you know the kind? And because I hate it when I forget to 'look before I leap' and realize {after it's too late} that all the TP is gone, I will continue to place 'extra' behind the sink.

So take that, Mr. Smith!! Bwaaahaaahaaa!!!!! That'll teach you to be so serious over a silly little thing like deformed TP!!!!!

Anyway . . .

All these people are being dead serious. And it makes me laugh. I think it's time for the world to loosen up a bit and remember to laugh a little more.

Forget about the wrinkly toilet paper.

And make more of these:


| no bake cookies |

in saucepan melt:
2cups sugar
1cube butter
1/2cup milk
1/4cup cocoa pwd

bring to a boil
let boil for approx. 5 min
remove from heat

then add:
1tsp. vanilla
3cups oats

let stand for about 20 min
stir every 5 min

spoon onto wax paper
chew, swallow, THEN laugh!

Why is it that colds make me crave chocolate? It's about the worst thing for a sore throat. And now, dear friends, I'm headed back to bed with the other love of my life- NyQuil. {And I know I'm going to read this tomorrow and realize that this post makes NO sense whatsoever- my apologies in advance}

3 post a comment :

MoonNStarMommy said...

I have two kids where minor health stuff can turn into major health stuff... and it just pisses me off when someone (::cough:: like my neighbor ::cough::) sends their child to school KNOWING they are sick because "it's not that bad" which then involves my kid getting sick, bringing it home and it causing Noah to be sick for 3 months and Nathan to be sick for 3 months also because their little bodies can't fight off "colds" the way others can. Annoys me to no end. And when I mention it to her she says "I just give them Tylenol and shove them out the door, they aren't dying" and I bring up what it does for my kids - she still blows it off. Then she makes comments like "don't you use Lysol and clean your house?" EXCUSE ME?? Gah!!

MoonNStarMommy said...

HA! I completely forgot why I came back over here (not that I didn't love that post) ... I have an award for you over at my blog :) Enjoy!!

Megan Champion said...

I CANT STAND thoes people that mail you the nickle or the penny and then ask you to give a donation!!!! That makes me crazy for the very same reason! Hubby Hubster and I have often ranted back and forth about why we cannot stand this.

Glad someone else feels our pain...

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